It's 6.14am

I am home. I need the toilet. My drink tastes funny. I am incredibly unimpressed by everything so far today. Fridge tells me I drank half a bottle of martini to myself last night, which doesn't sound like much but it is. Have realised I really don't know what I think about anything anymore. I'm wondering if I only do a lot of things because I think it's what I want to do and I feel like I'm young and I have all these expectations to live up to, like I'll regret it if I don't. Which to a certain extent is true. I don't know how I feel about a lot of people, I'm starting to wonder if I only like some people because I haven't been given a good enough reason to dislike them yet, or out of loyalty. Everyone is guilty of being self-obsessed and selfish sometimes (God knows I completely can be) but I'm really feeling like this past 6 months I've been giving so much more than I'm getting back from a lot of people. I've had a lot of conversations recently where I'm taking an interest and asking lots of questions and then I stop and realise that during like a 2 hour conversation I've barely even been asked how I am. I don't know how much I'm going to miss Exeter.